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From memory (at) blank.org Sun May 27 13:32:13 2001
Date: Sat, 26 May 2001 10:55:43 GMT
From: "Nathan J. Mehl, Road Worrier" <memory (at) blank.org>
To: memory (at) blank.org
Subject: return to planet blonde


A sunny afternoon in Amsterdam.  If this city got any more charming and
picturesque, they'd have to station troops at the border to beat off the
tourists with large sticks, and if the Dutch got any more laid back, they'd
be comatose...

It's a good thing that this place is so nice, because it makes a nice
antidote to our flight out...

After flying into Singapore, we spent Thursday wandering around the city,
mostly shopping.  And boy oh boy do the Singaporese shop: we were a week in
advance of the Great Singapore Sale, but many of the department stores were
already starting up their own clearances, and they were packed: think the
Herold Square Macy's on a spring Saturday, only with about three times as
many Japanese tourists.

I managed to provoke some unintentional comedy in the John Little
department store by asking one of the attendants to take my shirt
measurements, as I had no idea what my metric sizes were.  After measuring
my neck, the clerk took her tape measure to my arm, and immediately broke
out giggling, and motioned to one of her co-workers, who _also_ broke out
into giggles.  After they finished snorting at me, they carefully explained
that 15.5cm collars with 35cm arm lengths are...rather rare in asia, and
that I might be best off looking for short-sleeved shirts.  It was only by
massive effort of self-control that I was able to resist shuffling off
while making gorilla noises and scratching my armpits.

After about three hours of this, we reached Total Shopping Saturation, and
had to flee Orchard Road at a high velocity.  We hopped a bus into Little
India, where we managed to find a corner cafe that our guide had shown us
the first time we were in Singapore, where they make a wickedly strong cup
of ginger chai.  We eased ourselves onto the stools and drank several mugs
of the stuff before wandering around some more.  Finally at around 8pm, we
grabbed a bus back to the airport and checked in for our flight...

...which was mostly miserable.  On the plus side, we lucked out and got a
3-seat row to ourselves, which meant we were able to take turns napping in
an almost-but-not-quite comfortable fetal position (with legs on the
other's lap).  On the minus side, we were both stuck by unexpected
queasiness the moment the plane took off.  No idea why; I've never been
motion-sick in my life before, and nothing we'd eaten that day seemed
particularly bad.  This was exacerbated by a truly awful airplane dinner,
which consisted of Allegedly Asian Chicken with sides of Scary Meat Salad
and Evil Jello.  It ended up being the only moment on the trip where I
resorted to the anti-nausea syrup.  The rest of the flight was spent
fitfully napping, and we both looked like we'd been pulled through a
hedge-trimmer by the time we landed in Amsterdam.

Being back in the west again is almost disconcerting in ways.  Everything
is so...unexpectedly easy.  You can understand street signs!  The tap water
is drinkable!  Amsterdam compounds this effect being spotlessly clean,
endlessly picturesque, and filled with friendly people who speak flawless
English.  In its own way, it's as relaxing as the beach in Phuket was.

We're staying at the Hotel Pulitzer, which I had decided on in the
time-honored fashion: I called (back in New York before we left) at least
30 hotels, and it was the ONLY one that had any rooms available.  (Note:
late May would appear to by high tourist season here.)  It's kinda
expensive, but it is awfully cute: it was built by acquiring an entire
block of canal-side buildings and converting them into a contiguous hotel
while keeping the facades intact and the interior rooms as intact as
reasonably possible, so except for the main entrance it's a bit hard to
pick it out as a hotel at all.

After we checked in and completed a desperately needed shower and change of
clothes, we spent most of yesterday simply wandering the city.  Started out
at the Rijksmuseum and there found that it is in fact possible to see so
many Rembrants that your eyes cross.  After that, we ambled through the
Vondelpark and found that the same effect applies to half-or-more-naked
sunbathing Dutch people.  (Woo!)  Grabbed a falefel for lunch and then took
a brief nap back in the hotel room.

After waking up, we went to see the Anne Frank House, which is actually
just up the street from the Pulitzer.  It's a very well-constructed museum:
the walking tour takes you through the exterior office space, through the
hidden entrance into the secret annex, and through all the rooms, with
video displays and texts in Dutch and English providing context for each
area as you go through it.  Anne's room still has all of the movie pictures
and postcards she'd glued up on the walls preseved there.  The overall
effect is, of course, like being hit with a bucket of icewater compared to
the rest of Amsterdam's carefree charm.  I don't have much pithy commentary
on it, really...it's a good few steps beyond the point where pith is
appropriate.

For dinner, we found a small Dutch cafe, serving Spanish tapas, where we
drank Belgian beer and gloried in being American tourists...I love living
in the future!  As a small bonus, our food was served by the Cutest Waiter
in Recorded Human History.  Really, we checked.

This morning we woke up early (yay west-flying jetlag!) and wandered
through the Albert Kuip Market.  Allegedly the biggest open-air market in
Amsterdam, but it really mostly resembled your average New York street
fair...it really had nothing on, say, the market at Chaing Mai.  But it was
a nice walk anyways, and we got to watch a very cheeky sparrow make a
stategic assault on the minature squid at a fish vendor.

And that's Amsterdam so far.  We'll probably check out the red light
district and the coffeehouses this afternoon...then tomorrow we'll attempt
to peel ourselves out of bed and head...home.  What an odd thought after
all this time.

-n